There are blows and blows in life—not all of them have the same magnitude nor the same impact, both inside and out. Some arrive unannounced, without knocking on the door, without warning, not even giving you time to prepare. They were there, and suddenly, they appear.
There is nothing we can do to stop them when the force of the impact is far greater than we can bear. The tearing pain, the distress, take over us.
In the blink of an eye, what once surrounded us is no longer there.
We realize that loss has seized the present, here and now, There is no option to recover what is gone. Sometimes, when we lose something, we hold on to the hope of finding it again. But not here. The house, the business… we can’t find them again. They are gone, lost forever.
Loved ones have also left us—parents, children, siblings, cousins… How can we live without them? It is not the loss itself that hurts the most, but the absence of their presence that stirs a deep restlessness in the depths of the heart. They were here, and suddenly, they are absent forever.
When is it time to talk about rebuilding, to look at the future?
There is no single answer to the question of when one is ready to look toward the future.
Some people need years to accept with serenity the death of their loved ones, while others need months. Some never overcome the phase of loss and denial, existing only to survive rather than truly live.
There is a background melody that keeps playing, whispering that time heals everything. It is the melody of hope, the belief that there can be a glimmer of light amidst so much darkness.
I do not claim that time heals everything.
From my personal experience with painful moments that have left deep wounds in my being, time may not completely heal, but it does help. It creates distance, and with each passing day, there is one more step forward, a small gain in perspective.The pain does not vanish It still hurts, but it stings less. The wound begins to scab over.
Beyond time, a certain discipline is needed —willpower to restore routines, create new ones, and allow oneself to experience moments of well-being again.
These experiences transform us. We are no longer the same. We are no longer the people we once were. Our values and priorities have likely changed.
To survive or to live—that is a choice.
If the option is to live, we will be open to create a new life. It might require of a handmade work on our emotional being and spirit to accept what happened.
Acceptance will invite us to feel that it is indeed possible to live in peace with the absence of what we once loved so deeply. This may be a point of light in the future. That is when the memory of those we have lost, wrapped in sorrow, begins to transform into a vibration of love and gratitude for what life allowed us to share with them. We feel their presence in our hearts.
