Grief is a universal experience that manifests itself as a normal reaction to loss, real or imagined, and includes psychological, physical and social reactions of varying magnitude and intensity.
Grief is a concept that is not only associated with death or illness, but can originate for many reasons, such as professional reasons, such as a dismissal, or personal reasons, such as a divorce. Thus, grief can be not only a loss, but also a crisis or a change.
In short, and in terms of coaching, mourning is a rupture, because it breaks transparency.. Given this disparity of causes that can trigger a grieving process, I suggest that as coaches, we keep in mind that throughout our careers we may deal with coaching clients who are immersed in a grieving process and that in these processes our work is fundamental.
Coaching grief support
The support we provide as coaches can help to prevent psychological sequelae and prevent it from turning into pathological grief since, according to one study, the greater the perception of support received, the lesser the psychological sequelae.
Accompanying people going through bereavement requires working on responsibility, trust, expectations, requests, commitment, pain in the face of suffering, vulnerability, resentment and generosity.
We also make sure that grief emerges and is not delayed by obstacles such as limiting beliefs, hyperactivity, idealisation of the past or minimisation of the problem. Another important point of the coach's work in the grief process is to explaining the cycle and accompanying the coachee in all phases of the cycle, accepting if he takes a step backwards and, above all, accompanying him so that he does not stagnate at a certain stage.
The stages of grief
Regarding the stages of grief, which were first identified by the psychiatrist Elisabeth Kúbler-Ross, we should appreciate that, although they have a certain order, the duration of each stage varies from one person to another. Depending on the stage of the person we are accompanying, we can carry out different tasks.
If the person is in the denial phase, In the stage where he/she does not accept the loss or the change, the coach can help to unblock the emotion, as without emotion he/she cannot move on to the other stages.
In the angry phase the person is often in a state of discontent, anger and tends towards guilt. Letting the coachee vent and being observant of the conversation behind it and studying their limiting beliefs are some of the things a coach can do. Sadness is the emotion that connects us most with lucidity, this is when the person becomes aware of the loss. In this phase we can accompany the coachee, being present, legitimising their emotion.
The acceptance phase involves a change of vision. For the first time, the person comes to the foreground, no longer identifying with the loss, which he or she assumes to be inevitable. At this point, let's work on transformational learning and make a journey with the coachee through the strengths learnt and the things he/she can apply in the future.
