{"id":38284,"date":"2026-01-27T15:55:17","date_gmt":"2026-01-27T14:55:17","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.escuelacoaching.com\/?p=38284"},"modified":"2026-02-19T09:48:12","modified_gmt":"2026-02-19T08:48:12","slug":"automatic-eraser","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.escuelacoaching.com\/en\/blog\/posts\/automatic-eraser\/","title":{"rendered":"Willpower is overrated and why coaching does sustain change"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Lydia Vidal. When we talk about \u201cwillpower\u201d, we are almost always describing a symptom:\u00a0<em>I want to change, but I don't hold the change<\/em>. In executive coaching, the way out is rarely \u201ctry harder\u201d; it is often \"try harder\".\u00a0<strong>turning desire into a real action plan<\/strong>\u00a0and, above all, find out what is working against it: the\u00a0<strong>hidden commitment<\/strong>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>An&nbsp;<strong>action plan<\/strong>&nbsp;is not a list of good intentions. It is an operational bridge between \u201cwhat I want\u201d and \u201cwhat I do when no one sees me\u201d. And that bridge needs three things: concrete behaviour, designed context and follow-up. The first typical mistake is to define goals that are too abstract: \u201cdelegate more\u201d, \u201cmanage stress better\u201d, \u201cbe more assertive\u201d. This is not implemented. Instead, a good plan defines observable behaviours: \u201cI will do 2 delegation conversations per week\u201d, \u201cI will close the day with 10 minutes of planning\u201d, \u201cin meetings, I will make a clear request and close with an agreement\u201d.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>The second piece is the one that almost nobody looks at:&nbsp;<strong>the environment<\/strong>. If the context favours the opposite (chained meetings, notifications, a culture of urgency, lack of criteria), asking the will to compensate is unfair and ineffective. That is why, in a serious action plan, we always design the situation: what blocks we remove, what friction we add to what distracts, what signals we put in place to remind us, what rituals we create to sustain.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>And here's the crucial point: even if the plan is well formulated, sometimes the person&nbsp;<em>knows<\/em>&nbsp;what he has to do and yet he still boycotts it. Not because of a lack of discipline, but because there is a&nbsp;<strong>hidden commitment<\/strong>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Hidden commitment is a real but undeclared commitment that competes with the target. It is usually activated to protect something valuable: image, belonging, control, security, competence, status. For example:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\">\n<li>I want\u00a0<strong>delegate<\/strong>, but I am committed (without saying so) to\u00a0<strong>not to lose control<\/strong>\u00a0or\u00a0<strong>not to be expendable<\/strong>.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>I want\u00a0<strong>setting limits<\/strong>, but I am committed to\u00a0<strong>not to be seen as difficult<\/strong>\u00a0or\u00a0<strong>not disappointing anyone<\/strong>.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>I want\u00a0<strong>prioritise<\/strong>, but I am committed to\u00a0<strong>prove that I can do it all<\/strong>.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>I want\u00a0<strong>having difficult conversations<\/strong>, but I am committed to\u00a0<strong>avoid tension<\/strong>\u00a0or\u00a0<strong>not to be disliked<\/strong>.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\n<p>When that hidden commitment exists, change becomes an internal pulse. And in that pulse, \u201cwillpower\u201d often loses because the system is defending a deep need.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/www.escuelacoaching.com\/en\/blog\/posts\/ordering-to-enable-change-and-happiness\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">In coaching, we work on this in a very practical way.<\/a>a: start with the target, identify the behaviour that is not occurring, and then ask honest questions:\u00a0<strong>\u201cWhat are you preventing from happening if you do this for real?\u201d<\/strong>. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Fears often arise: \u201cif I delegate, the quality will drop and I will be judged\u201d, \u201cif I set limits, I will lose influence\u201d, \u201cif I speak my mind, the relationship will break down\u201d. This fear is often supported by a\u00a0<strong>great belief<\/strong>\u00a0(sometimes invisible) \u201cif I'm not on top, things go wrong\u201d, \u201cif I don't please, I'm rejected\u201d, \u201cif I don't perform consistently, I'm worth less\u201d.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Progress is not about \u201celiminating\u201d fear, it is about&nbsp;<strong>design an action plan that includes<\/strong>. That is: I am not asking you to jump into the void; I am asking you to conduct a controlled experiment that proves (or adjusts) your belief without jeopardising your credibility.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Example applied to delegation:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\">\n<li>Objective: delegate more.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Current behaviour: I continue to resolve.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Hidden commitment: protect quality\/image.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Belief: \u201cif I delegate, quality goes down and I look bad\u201d.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>2-week experiment: I delegate a task with clear criteria, an intermediate checkpoint and a definition of \u201cfinished\u201d. I measure quality, time spent and actual level of control needed.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\n<p>This transforms the change from epic to learning. And here the action plan becomes powerful, because it no longer relies on \u201cholding on\u201d but on three anchors:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<ol class=\"wp-block-list\">\n<li><strong>Minimum sustained action<\/strong>\u00a0(small, repeatable).<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><strong>Structure<\/strong>\u00a0(agenda, ritual, reminder, criteria).<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><strong>Experiment<\/strong>\u00a0(test that reduces fear and adjusts belief).<\/li>\n<\/ol>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Lydia Vidal. When we talk about \u201cwillpower,\u201d we are almost always describing a symptom: I want to change, but I can't sustain the change. In executive coaching, the solution is rarely \u201ctry harder\u201d; it is usually about turning the desire into a real action plan and, above all, discovering what is working against it: hidden commitment. An action plan is not a [...]<\/p>","protected":false},"author":6,"featured_media":38285,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[595],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-38284","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-post"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.escuelacoaching.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/38284","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.escuelacoaching.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.escuelacoaching.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.escuelacoaching.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/6"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.escuelacoaching.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=38284"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/www.escuelacoaching.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/38284\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":38813,"href":"https:\/\/www.escuelacoaching.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/38284\/revisions\/38813"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.escuelacoaching.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/38285"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.escuelacoaching.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=38284"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.escuelacoaching.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=38284"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.escuelacoaching.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=38284"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}