From an early age we learn the importance of giving to others without expecting anything in return. This is how we commonly understand generosity. Offering our time, help, a listening ear, service\u2026 It is a highly appreciated quality and we like it when people say of us: \u201cwhat a generous person\u201d.<\/p>\n
This belief (giving without expecting anything in return) becomes powerful because it reinforces our public identity and anyone who doesn't have the practice of sharing is labelled as \u201cselfish\u201d<\/strong>, because she thinks of him and his needs.<\/p>\n For years, my \u201cgiving without expecting\u201d had evolved into a \u201cgiving, without needing others\u201d. I had become, I believe now, a self-sufficient person. People around me offered me help, time, ideas, gifts... which I received, yes, although I didn't value it as it deserved. <\/strong>I placed myself \u201cabove\u201d them, in a tremendous fit of egoplus: \u00abyou people have needs, I don't need anything, I'm self-sufficient, I can manage on my own\u00bb.<\/p>\n When we give frequently, we can awaken in the people around us the generous impulse to return some of what they receive in order to reduce or balance the debt they feel they are acquiring with us, or else through their own \u201cgenerous engine\u201d.<\/p>\n The clearest example for me is children. When they are little we give to them, care for them, feed them, etc. As they grow older, they need to feel useful and valued, to do \u201cgrown-up things\u201d. If we don't let them take part, do things their own way, take on responsibilities and play an active role, we can foster the belief that \u201cgrown-ups don't need our help\u201d, and they will stop giving and offering.<\/p>\n I understand now that I must distinguish between \u201cgenerous in giving\u201d versus \u201cgenerous in giving and receiving\u201d. From the perspective of being generous in receiving and giving, I can create a space for others to be generous whenever they want. <\/strong>And I do not judge the quality of what I receive, the quantity or the suitability to my style, but rather I sincerely appreciate it to give value to the other person. Furthermore, I dare to ask when, up until that moment, the space for sharing has been small.<\/p>\n Costs? Perhaps, for our public identity, because others will perceive us as \u201cless perfect and self-sufficient\u201d. Benefits? Oh, they are so many! It reinforces trust and love, increases connection with the other person...<\/p>\n Do you fancy giving it a try? In which relationships can you expand the space of generosity, of sharing by giving, asking, or accepting?<\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Desde peque\u00f1os\u00a0aprendemos\u00a0la importancia de dar a los dem\u00e1s\u00a0sin esperar nada a cambio. As\u00ed\u00a0entendemos com\u00fanmente la generosidad. Ofrecer nuestro tiempo, ayuda, escucha, servicio\u2026 Es una cualidad muy apreciada\u00a0y nos gusta que digan de nosotros: \u201cqu\u00e9 persona tan generosa\u201d. Esta creencia (dar, sin tener la expectativa de recibir a cambio) se convierte en poderosa, porque refuerza nuestra […]<\/p>","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":29114,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[595],"tags":[671],"class_list":["post-29113","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-post","tag-distinciones"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.escuelacoaching.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/29113","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.escuelacoaching.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.escuelacoaching.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.escuelacoaching.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.escuelacoaching.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=29113"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.escuelacoaching.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/29113\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":38859,"href":"https:\/\/www.escuelacoaching.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/29113\/revisions\/38859"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.escuelacoaching.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/29114"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.escuelacoaching.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=29113"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.escuelacoaching.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=29113"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.escuelacoaching.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=29113"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}Generosity in balance<\/h2>\n
Generous to a fault<\/h2>\n